On First Person Present, and WIPs

[unfeathered]

Jades, you were right.

First person present is hard.



Following the discussions about Part 2 of Master Plan, I went and wrote a nice little chunk from Jack's POV, which succeeded in getting his motivation straight in my head.

And then I read jadesfire2808's comments about 'show, not tell' over on fandom_me's journal, and I finally understood what she was saying about first person present making it far too easy to go emo and expositiony. Which is what I'd done. I get it now, Jades :-).

So. I'm going to keep Jack's soliloquy as a character study, just for myself. And I think I'm going to try keeping the story from the Master's POV, and try and get Jack's motivation across in other ways. And hopefully use some of the lines from Jack's soliloquy here and there because, even if I do say it myself, there were some good lines!

It's interesting, though. I've done a fair bit first person past (in particular, that great long thing I'm writing) and hadn't realised how different first person present is. How hard it is to stop it just becoming the narrator's thoughts, almost like a diary. This is a fascinating journey I'm on here.


Thought on WIPs


When other people do them, especially if they're people like me who might take ages to post the next chapter, I hate them. Unless I really know and trust the author, I leave them unread, so I can go back and read them when they're finished – and then when they're finished there's just too much to trawl through so I never do get round to reading them.

And I never meant to be one of those people who posts chapters as they go along.

But I'm getting such incredibly useful feedback in comments, not just from my betas, that I'm going to keep posting like this. And I apologise in advance for when my inspiration dries up and I find myself unable to write anything for months on end.

Saying that, I am at least trying to make each chapter relatively self-contained and not too cliff-hangery…

Comments

[becky-h.livejournal.com]

Exposition is so easy to fall into with first person and present tense. The whole thing just becomes temptation. The key for me, if you're at all interested, is to think about how 'deeply' the character would be thinking about things/saying things. Determine how far into their head you're going to go, and leave it there.

...And first person's just hard, period.

[unfeathered]

Thanks. That's actually extremely useful.

I think I'm going to have to sleep on this one. I'm shattered and need to go to bed. Pretty much now.

I'll work it out in the morning!

[becky-h.livejournal.com]

Sleep well and *lots of hugs*

[becky-h.livejournal.com]

Oh, and re: WIPS.

I suck. I started one. Six months ago. Then I hit a problem, had to lock/remove the whole thing. And I forgot about it.

Someone asked about it today. It's nearly done. I promised them I'd get it finished and up, and I will. I'll also possibly tear my hair out in the doing.

[unfeathered]

Wow! I didn't think you'd done anything series-like at all!

[becky-h.livejournal.com]

I managed to yank it pretty fast, because I caught the error but I really need to haul my ass back and fix and finish it.

...and get myself out of the corner I've painted myself into *G*

[unfeathered]

Well, if you need any help... :-)

[fandom-me.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I need help and will crawl up your leg as soon as I remind myself what I was trying to do. Basically it's "Nine falls through the rift in end of days, steals Jack *cough*. The corner comes down to getting it to even KIND OF meet at canon again." *eyes cross* I remember, very vaguely, what I was thinking at the time, but I must have been on crack or something *babbles*

[unfeathered]

Mmm, sounds... interesting? Look forward to seeing it :-)

[fandom-me.livejournal.com]

I think at the time I was suffering from "I have to write Jack/Nine for a challenge, I can't write DW Jack (so I thought), and trying to play. That or I was just dumb, but anyway. There's a reason I don't post WIPS *G*

[jadesfire2808.livejournal.com]

Ooops...now I have guilt....

But Becky's absolutely right - if you've got a character who would think all that stuff through in that way, then deep introspection becomes showing. But if you've got someone like Jack or the Doctor, I don't think they consciously process things like that.

Sorry the Jack-piece didn't work out, but no writing is wasted writing - it sounds like you know what you're doing and where you're going, which is definitely a good thing. I tend not to read WIPs either, unless they're from someone I know and trust as well. Semi-self-contained stories are definitely more helpful than cliffhangers as they give me both the pay off and the suspense.

Hope the inspiration continues cos it's going great so far! :)

[unfeathered]

Don't have guilt! What you've said has been incredibly helpful - because I do want my writing to be good!

I was thinking about this last night when I was supposed to be sleeping (*g*) and I feel that possibly the answer is not to leave the POV character on their own for too long. I.e. don't give them a chance to go introspective! It works all right if they're talking to someone, or talking about someone (like Part 1), because they're thinking about/describing someone else. But leave them alone and they start thinking about themselves more than they believably would.

Does that make any kind of sense? :-)

Anyway, Jack's soliloquy is definitely not wasted, because I did need to do it to work it all out in my head. And as I said above, I can hopefully use bits of it. I'm still not sure whose POV the next bit is going to be from - I may have to try both and see what works - but this is so very interesting that I don't mind having to work at it. It's really good fun!

And re. WIPs - I have to admit that one of the WIPs I didn't read as it went along and haven't yet got round to reading is your Waiting/Wandering years thing - and I really want to read it, but God knows when I'll have the time. I'm so busy writing and 'talking' atm that I've even let the other three WIPs I was keeping up with slide. And I haven't watched telly for days...!

And thanks for the compliments :-)

[jadesfire2808.livejournal.com]

Always happy to help :) I think you're dead right about not leaving characters on their own, and it sounds like you've got it all under control!

I actually never post WIPs, having learnt my lesson in the X-men fandom (don't ask). The Waiting/Wandering Years are stand-alone stories in series, rather than chapters of one story, if that makes sense. I wrote them all before posting, on the basis that I could then go back and change things if I needed to. Since I change my mind about most things eight times a day, it's the only way I can work now :D It's done me good to have a break from them for a few months, as I want to get the final series knocked out at some point, but needed the distance to work out what worked and what didn't. There's some corners I've written myself into that I need to get out of again!

Sorry, rambling away. Hope the inspiration continues and looking forward to part 3!

[unfeathered]

Thank you so much - you have no idea how much help you are!

Anyway, Part 3 is underway and it is Master's POV. And I'm feeling pretty good about it :-)